All types of experiences, emotions, thoughts, desires, etc. are stored in our sub-conscious mind. However, our conscious mind is not at all aware of all these, because there is a sort of a barrier between the conscious and the sub-conscious mind. When the impressions in our sub-conscious mind are constantly expressed through our actions, we call it as our nature or personality. For example, a person who gets angry at minor things, is called as a 'short tempered' person. When a person always keeps on postponing his work we call him a 'lazy' person.
Give self-suggestions to remove your personality defects. A person's personality comprises of both, his qualities and defects. The defects in a person's nature have negative effects on him as well as on those around him. In order to remove personality defects, it is necessary to imbibe appropriate impressions in one's subconscious mind. This can be achieved by repeatedly bombarding the mind with thoughts that will create those impressions. This is called self-suggestion or auto-suggestion. In this, we give suitable positive suggestions to our sub-conscious mind. This is done by repeating a particular suggestion several times in our mind and carefully paying attention to each and every word in it. Ideally, one should give these self-suggestions 5 times daily and in every sitting, the suggestion should be repeated 5 times in one's mind. Before every sitting, it is advisable to chant the name of the kuldevata (Family Deity) or one's favourite Deity; then one can start giving self-suggestions. Let us see a few examples of some common personality defects and the suggestions one can give to overcome those defects.
Method of giving self-suggestions
1st Method : Recognising the wrong action and correcting it
In this method, the self-suggestion is framed such, that the person is able to recognize his inappropriate thoughts, emotions and actions and gain control over them.
Self-suggestion : Whenever any wrong thoughts or emotions come in my mind or whenever I am performing some undesirable action, I will immediately realise it and try to stop it.
Saurabh was inattentive while doing his Maths homework. After every few minutes, he would look here and there; then he would start chatting with his brother.
Let us see how to give self-suggestions on the personality defects noticed in the above incident, that is, lack of concentration and lack of seriousness about studies.
Suggestion : Self-suggestion for 'lack of concentration' in the above example : "Whenever my mind gets distracted while doing my homework or whenever I start to unnecessarily chat with my brother during studies, I will immediately realise it and will try to again concentrate my mind on my homework."
Self-suggestion for 'lack of seriousness' about studies in the above example : "I will keep in mind that I have to get full marks in my Mathematics exam. So I must study it with full concentration."
Let us see a few more examples of personality defects and the self-suggestions for those defects.
After returning home from school, Swati threw her school uniform and bag on her bed.
Personality defect : Untidiness
Self-suggestion : Whenever I keep my school uniform and bag untidily on the bed, I shall become aware of it and immediately keep them neatly in the appropriate place.
Sandeep was annoyed with his father when he asked where he had been when he returned home late at night
Personality defect : Anger and Rudeness
Self-suggestion : Whenever my father asks me the reason for coming home late, I shall realise that he is asking so because of his concern about me and I shall politely tell him the reason for being late.
During the English lecture in college, Sharvari was thinking about how she would participate and how she would dress-up in the annual college gathering.
Personality defect : Day-dreaming.
Self-suggestion : Whenever I start day-dreaming during the lecture in college, I shall become aware of it and immediately start paying attention to what is being taught in class.
Now, let us consider the various reactions emerging in the mind in different circumstances. In every situation, a person gives some reaction or response. It might be either appropriate or inappropriate. Inappropriate or negative reactions occur due to the defects in the person's personality; whereas appropriate or positive reactions occur as a result of the person's virtues. By giving self-suggestions, one is able to generate positive thoughts in his mind and react appropriately to any given situation. Various defects such as irritable behaviour, anger, quarrelsome behaviour, stubbornness, suspicious nature etc. can be overcome by this method.
Vinay got upset when his father told him to stop playing and start studying. Here, Vinay was unable to understand the motive behind his father's words. Since he was playing outside for a long time, his father made him realise that still he had to complete his studies. In this example, Vinay's father says to him, "You have played long enough, now start studying." Vinay gives the following self-suggestion so that the appropriate reaction is generated in his mind. – Whenever my father says, 'You have played long enough, now start studying', I will realise why he is saying so and immediately start studying.
Abhijeet's class teacher told him to become the monitor of the class. On this, the following thoughts came in his mind, 'How will it be possible for me to manage my studies along with this extra responsibility? I shall not be able to control so many students. What if the bully of the class doesn't listen to me?' He refused to take up the responsibility. Here, the personality defects are fear, lack of self-confidence and disobedience. Here the appropriate action would be to obey the teacher and accept responsibility as the teacher has given him the responsibility only after knowing his capability. The following self-suggestion should be given – 'Whenever the class teacher gives me extra responsibility of becoming class monitor, I shall immediately accept the responsibility and approach the teacher in case of difficulty .'
When the mind is tensed and anxious prior to examinations, interviews or elocution competition, one should do a rehearsal of the situation. One should chant God's Name and create a scene in his mind wherein he is successfully facing the situation which he is fearful of. This helps in removing the anxiety of the situation.
Example : Let us see how to remove fear of exams from students' mind. First, the student should be seated comfortably on a chair, close his eyes and chant the Name of his Family Deity or his favourite Deity for 3 to 4 minutes. Then, he should say the following suggestion in his mind and merge his mind with the suggestion.
Suggestion : 'You are fully prepared for the examination. Tomorrow is the exam. You are quickly going through the notes of the subject. Now you feel you shall be able to answer questions properly. You have reached the exam hall on time. The 1st bell has rung. You are calmly seated on the seat allotted to you, with your eyes closed and without any thoughts in your mind. Now the 2nd bell has rung. You now have the question paper in your hand. You go through the questions and decide which questions you are going to attempt. All the questions are easy. You are satisfactorily answering all the questions. The warning bell has rung, 10 minutes prior to the final bell. You quickly go through the answer paper to check whether nothing has been left out. The final bell has rung and you hand over your answer paper to the supervisor. You have returned home and you are gladly telling everyone at home that the paper was easy. Now you are going to rest for a while and then start preparing for the next paper.'
Similarly, we can also rehearse for other situations which we fear. This helps in facing the situation with confidence.
Compiler : Mr. Yadnesh Sawant, Panvel.